Of difficult days
I have been wondering and pondering about this one for the longest time.
Have you all ever been in a scenario, when the things you don’t want to face often come and look at you straight in the eye. About what you fear the most- is often what you end up encountering most frequently?
I have, for one, been though this rollercoater several times. A fear of needles got me more pricks than anyone I have known. A fear of hospitals got me prolonged stays each time I got hospitalized. And what I strongly said I would never do in this life- well, life brought that around me, every single day.
While sometimes I do wish there was a time machine- that could make me go back and reverse some of the situations and circumstances that made me face my fears head on, but then I realize that those would still find me- in their own way.
As humans, we all have certain weaknesses- can’t deal with pain, can’t deal with pests, can’t deal with tragedy, can’t deal with loneliness, can’t deal with the loss of parents etc etc. I am sure I am not the only one who has and dreads these.
I am beginning to think that each lifetime that we have is a learning lesson for us. I recently learned of soul-contracts- of how there are certain lessons that our souls need to learn in each lifetime. That explains perhaps why we experience what we do- and not just in a sorrow mode. Some people have absolutely enriched, happy lives, and perhaps that happiness is the lesson written for them this time. And others- have struggles after struggle. Pain, separation, anxiety, an emptiness- perhaps that is their lesson.
I have also often wondered if the reverse psychology works here. To tell myself- I am not afraid of heights, I am not afraid of heights- and then perhaps a 23rd floor balcony would not overwhelm me. However, it never works like that. We have to live up to our other-world commitments, until it is ingrained at our soul levels.
Having currently seeing a similar situation up close- and am finding myself praying for this painful lesson to defer itself to another lifetime. However, I am also feeling grateful for our own lifetimes and our own lessons. Sometimes, when we peep outside, it is much harsher out there. The story about the man with no shoes meeting the man with no legs never fails. Each time leaves a lesson to have gratitude, to be thankful for all that we have.
In these diffucult times, I am grateful for the family, for a few friends, for my beautiful children and for all the second chances that life has and is offering to me. So while I may be bitter and sad about a few things, and cry each day about others- I am learning my soul-lesson each day.
What are your such soul-lessons?
